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[The Onion] Ron Artest Tells Reporters He Lives For The NBA Playoffs, Coconut Shrimp

Discussion in 'Houston Rockets: Game Action & Roster Moves' started by Hippieloser, May 15, 2009.

  1. Hippieloser

    Hippieloser Contributing Member

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    http://www.theonion.com/content/news_briefs/ron_artest_tells_reporters?utm_source=a-section

    LOS ANGELES—With his team down 3-2 to the Lakers in the Western Conference Semifinals, Rockets forward Ron Artest explained in a postgame interview Tuesday that he lives for the pressure and excitement of the NBA Playoffs as well as a plateful of sweet, crunchy coconut shrimp. "That's why I'm here. This is what it's all about," Artest said while dunking one of several jumbo-sized postgame coconut shrimp into a cup of piña colada dipping sauce. "I love the NBA. I really love it. Just as I love coconut shrimp." Basketball commentators have responded to Artest's claims by saying they are "really in the mood for coconut shrimp."






    *Note to Chinese reporters: This is a parody.
     
  2. ItsMyFault

    ItsMyFault Contributing Member

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    The funny thing about all of this is.. I could actually see him saying this. lol
     
  3. leroy

    leroy Contributing Member

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    Considering the subject, if it wasn't an Onion article, I'd believe it in a second.
     
  4. The_Yoyo

    The_Yoyo Contributing Member

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    you know with Ron i would actually believe this
     
  5. ClutchCityReturns

    ClutchCityReturns Contributing Member

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    Considering it's Ron, I'm actually surprised that it's an Onion article.
     
  6. Pest_Ctrl

    Pest_Ctrl Member

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    The Onion got nothing compared to Ron-Ron himself. :D

    http://bbs.clutchfans.net/showthread.php?t=169025

    "'Five Dollar Foot-long' is one of the best songs," Artest said. "That's a hot song. You've got the FreeCreditReport.com, and then 'Five Dollar Foot-long' comes on. When 'Five Dollar Foot-long' comes on, they should play that in the club. They should play all those in the club."
     
  7. Hayesfan

    Hayesfan Contributing Member

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    that's funny, I would believe it too...

    Coconut shrimp, five dollar footlongs and he really likes that free credit report.com! :)
     
  8. Duncan McDonuts

    Duncan McDonuts Contributing Member

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    Artest is crazy. We should start a thread for him like the Drexlerisms. Last night during one of the interviews, I remember him mentioning he loves to be on the Rockets because of the medical coverage.
     
  9. famicom

    famicom Member

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    The medical coverage?
     
  10. vlaurelio

    vlaurelio Contributing Member

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    is that the best the onion can do? its freakn ron artest..
     
  11. KingCheetah

    KingCheetah Contributing Member

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    Note to Chinese reporters: in US American English parody means deadly serious and completely non-satirical.
     
  12. Hayesfan

    Hayesfan Contributing Member

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    He said that the doctors are good to him or something along those lines.. ;)
     
  13. Furious Jam

    Furious Jam Contributing Member

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    The NBA: Where Coconut Shrimp Happens
     
  14. Carl Herrera

    Carl Herrera Contributing Member

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    Is this comment any more random than the $5 footlong one?
     
  15. BigBenito

    BigBenito Member

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    Methinks the Onion outscooped the mainstream sports media.
     
  16. Hippieloser

    Hippieloser Contributing Member

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  17. ItsMyFault

    ItsMyFault Contributing Member

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    Maybe it was asked in the moment... it may seem random on here though since we're all talking about basketball.
     
  18. dachuda86

    dachuda86 Member

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    This is the best photoshop I've seen today...
     
  19. Hippieloser

    Hippieloser Contributing Member

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    It's just MSPaint. :D Sadly, I've got no photoshop skillz.
     
  20. DonnyMost

    DonnyMost be kind. be brave.
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    "It's good to be a Houston Rocket because the doctors are free" -- Ron Artest
     

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