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My mom has a schizophrenic cat that terrorizes me on the daily. Is there anything that can be done?

Discussion in 'BBS Hangout' started by jacoby, Jan 21, 2015.

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  1. jacoby

    jacoby Member

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    So I just moved back in with my mom temporarily (not a neckbeard, just 19), and her cat is the devil. Literally. She was my childhood cat and I haven't seen her in a while, so I don't know what happened. She used to love me. Now she attacks me every single night.

    ****ed up part? When other people are around, she will sleep on my lap, roll around, rub her head on me, and act like the sweetest little thing. My mom thinks it's adorable. When everyone goes to sleep though? She pounces, she throws right hooks, bites, screams... everything under the sun. It's horrifying.

    Exhibit A: Just two nights ago she kept me prisoner in my own basement --

    <a href="http://imgur.com/8fTdcE3"><img src="http://i.imgur.com/8fTdcE3.jpg" title="source: imgur.com" /></a>

    Exhibit B: Staring me down when I'm watching Bob's Burgers.

    <a href="http://imgur.com/ebDzotu"><img src="http://i.imgur.com/ebDzotu.jpg" title="source: imgur.com" /></a>

    Exhibit C: The final straw. She attacked me in my dead sleep earlier tonight. Woke up with her claws in my eye. I threw her off me and she chased me into the bathroom where I hid with the door locked for about 45 minutes. My mom ignored my pleas for help and the operator told me this didn't warrant a 911 emergency, so I was left to fend for myself.

    <a href="http://imgur.com/juYSPlX"><img src="http://i.imgur.com/juYSPlX.jpg" title="source: imgur.com" /></a>

    <a href="http://imgur.com/zeIjhYf"><img src="http://i.imgur.com/zeIjhYf.jpg" title="source: imgur.com" /></a>

    <a href="http://imgur.com/NxBypsd"><img src="http://i.imgur.com/NxBypsd.jpg" title="source: imgur.com" /></a>







    <a href="http://imgur.com/SF3RE65"><img src="http://i.imgur.com/SF3RE65.jpg" title="source: imgur.com" /></a>

    <a href="http://imgur.com/LgvF0iE"><img src="http://i.imgur.com/LgvF0iE.png" title="source: imgur.com" /></a>

    <a href="http://imgur.com/B0q4MYt"><img src="http://i.imgur.com/B0q4MYt.png" title="source: imgur.com" /></a>

    What can be done? My mom thinks we get along great (because the damn cat puts on an act when she's around), and thinks I'm lying just so I can get rid of her because I've been saying I wanted a dog. I'm sick of being a prisoner, I'm sick of the midnight curbstompings, and I'm sick of Boots.
     
    #1 jacoby, Jan 21, 2015
    2 people like this.
  2. Two Sandwiches

    Two Sandwiches Contributing Member

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    I really hope you didn't call 911. LOL


    Man up the next time she comes at you. Don't stoop to her level, because....well...you know what that makes you....
     
    #2 Two Sandwiches, Jan 21, 2015
  3. Haymitch

    Haymitch Custom Title
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    Get a mask and some boxing gloves and throw down with the cat.
     
    #3 Haymitch, Jan 21, 2015
  4. Dgn1

    Dgn1 Member

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    That's pretty dam funny and creepy.
     
    #4 Dgn1, Jan 21, 2015
  5. cheke64

    cheke64 Member

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    Have you tried rockbottoming the cat?
     
    #5 cheke64, Jan 21, 2015
  6. Jontro

    Jontro Member

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    Looks like a cute cat... you sure you're not just hating breh?
     
    #6 Jontro, Jan 21, 2015
  7. Mr. Clutch

    Mr. Clutch Contributing Member

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    Be nice to it and give it some catnip.
     
    #7 Mr. Clutch, Jan 21, 2015
  8. Outlier

    Outlier Member

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    Fake.
     
    #8 Outlier, Jan 21, 2015
  9. RunninRaven

    RunninRaven Contributing Member
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    Sounds like the worst of it comes at night while sleeping. I recommend closing your door.

    That or antifreeze.
     
    #9 RunninRaven, Jan 21, 2015
  10. Roc Paint

    Roc Paint Contributing Member

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    Coming soon...Clutch Kitty!
     
    #10 Roc Paint, Jan 21, 2015
  11. KingCheetah

    KingCheetah Contributing Member

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    Establish dominance.
     
    #11 KingCheetah, Jan 21, 2015
  12. BamBam

    BamBam Contributing Member

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    Pee-wee: This box contains over 217 bits and pieces of information, evidence.


    [​IMG]


    Exhibit A: A photograph of the victims, my bike and me.

    Exhibit B: Another photograph. What's missing from this picture? It's just me WITHOUT MY BIKE!

    Exhibit C: The horn I was picking up at Chuck's Bikeorama when my bike was actually stolen!

    Exhibit D: Jimmy what is this? Too late! Chip!

    Chip: It looks like a pen.

    Pee-wee: Exactly! I bought this pen exactly one hour before my bike was stolen. Why? What's the significance? I DON'T KNOW!
    .......
    .......
    .......
     
    #12 BamBam, Jan 21, 2015
    1 person likes this.
  13. Scionxa

    Scionxa Contributing Member

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    replace it with a labrador. You can take the cat for a ride and drop it off at a park or something
     
    #13 Scionxa, Jan 21, 2015
  14. Felixthecat

    Felixthecat Contributing Member

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    It's protecting you from an evil troll that lives in your walls.
     
    #14 Felixthecat, Jan 21, 2015
  15. rockbox

    rockbox Around before clutchcity.com

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    Nothing an airsoft gun can't deal with.
     
    #15 rockbox, Jan 21, 2015
  16. body slam

    body slam Member

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    put scotch tape on the bottom of its feet
     
    #16 body slam, Jan 21, 2015
  17. codell

    codell Contributing Member

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    Don't put the p***y on a pedestal. Problem solved.
     
    #17 codell, Jan 21, 2015
  18. boomboom

    boomboom I GOT '99 PROBLEMS
    Supporting Member

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    Still undefeated??!?
     
    #18 boomboom, Jan 21, 2015
  19. TheFreak

    TheFreak Contributing Member

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    [​IMG]
     
    #19 TheFreak, Jan 21, 2015
    2 people like this.
  20. FTW Rockets FTW

    FTW Rockets FTW Contributing Member

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    Let the p***y know who is boss. Do her real bad that she can't get up for days
     
    #20 FTW Rockets FTW, Jan 21, 2015
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