So you admit that his race played a factor in you assuming he was a bellmen - then you are partly to blame for judging him by his skin color. Usually a bellman wears a uniform - I wouldn't assume anyone dressed in civilian clothes would be a bellmen. [Pro-Tip] By the way, you really should learn how to manage your own money. These guys will fleece you of your soft-earned cash and honestly you can make better investments just thinking long term and a portfolio approach. Now that's a generous tip for you Jorge, and I didn't even have to assume you were wait staff because you were Mexican. GOOD DAY
Yeah it's not as big a deal as in our minds. I mean it seems the OP has read a whole lot into a single facial expression. It was only after years of tipping the guy who cuts my hair, did I figure out you're not supposed to tip the owner, had always tipped anyone who does a personal service like that. Seems obvious in retrospect, just never thought about it. Now do the opposite, if I'm forced to guess how not to offend someone, i'm not taking the chance of paying money to insult them. I recently bought fertilizer from a specialty commercial landscapers supply shop, where the guys seem more than clerks, are very knowledgeable and professional, and white. The bags he brought out were a little dirty, as they usually are. He brought out windex and got them perfectly clean before loading them. Didn't tip, just for the reason we're discussing. Should have anyway, at least the amount of discount he gave me vs. the price they quoted on the phone. Next time I'm there, I'll tip and make it super awkward explaining why I didn't last time.
I do when the poster I'm responding to doesn't take themselves seriously and uses the D&D as their comedy fix.
Don't you think it's peculiar that TJ saw many black bellmen and somehow assumed that this guy who was black but not dressed like the other black bellmen was assumed to be a bellman? His story doesn't add up. You know why?
Isn't that ironic coming from you with your concern trolling about me jokingly calling him an incel? You can't have it both ways. I enjoy having sincere conversations sometimes. D&D can often satisfy that fix as I don't really like having hotly contested political debates with people I actually know irl. This is a good place to get it all out. It's annoying when half of the alleged conservatives on the D&D hardly are willing to have sincere conversations.
Ann Althouse weighs in on serious business: I find myself reading in all the little pockets of time that were once reserved for the serious business... https://althouse.blogspot.com/2019/05/you-arent-enjoying-reading-then-read.html?m=1
Why should someone be offended by being mistaken for being a caddie or bellman when they are loading golfbags? Is that kind of work beneath people? If I were helping out an event by loading bags, I hope I don't take myself so seriously that I would be offended by someone trying to be polite/generous.
[Premium Post] Boom, you just hit the nail on the head. The $5 tip was not returned to me. By keeping the $5, the banker's arguments are nullified and he has ceded the moral high ground. Now he is taking advantage of my very innocent and well-intentioned mistake, and is deriving personal gain. He can't have it both ways -- he either needs to choose 1) take offence or 2) profit. He chose profit. A similar incident occurred at a graduation once, where I mistook a guest for a panhandler. This guy approached me on a sidewalk as I was walking towards the ceremony and said, "Excuse me sir, but can you..." and before he could finish, I cut him off by waving my hand and said "no thanks". He did a similar pout face + stomp. Turns out he was looking for directions to the ceremony. Don't blame me my man, blame the 3 other people that approached me that day asking for money. GOOD DAY
If you want to understand the perspective of why it might be offensive I suggest you watch this video: There is a 400 year history of people telling black people they are too dumb for high skilled professions and that they are only suited for hard labor.
The usual suspects fail to realize that TJ's mistake was his assumption that the man of color was a bellboy, rather than a fellow man offering to put away his clubs. Not that he tipped him.