NBA Stars vs. Van Helsing? (Mad Max mention)

from that other basketball site...

May 7, 2004 -- According to lore, during the late 19th century, famed monster hunter Dr. Gabriel Van Helsing headed to Eastern Europe to battle notorious villains such as Dracula, Frankenstein and the Wolf Man.
With Van Helsing, starring Hugh Jackman, opening today nationwide, it got the Buzz thinking: How would Van Helsing fare if he had to hunt down some of the NBA’s greatest “villains”?

How would the hunter deal with the ferocity of Mel “The Killer” Davis? How would he defend the endless range of Vernon “Mad Max” Maxwell? How could he contain the energy of Vinnie “The Microwave” Johnson? How would he figure out Allen "The Answer" Iverson? What about Tom "The Terminator" Hammonds? Even if he managed to vanquish them all, would he have to the stamina to fend off Connie "The Hawk" Hawkins, Robert "The Chief" Parish, George "The Iceman" Gervin, Billy "The Whopper" Paultz and Marvin "The Human Eraser" Webster?

Then again, if Van Helsing runs into trouble, he can always enlist Shaquille "Superman" O'Neal for help.


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stupid but cool