[FUNNY] How are U.S. Prisoners Passing Their Time?

12% Sharpening spoons against floor as quietly as possible
13% Picking teeth out of stool 24 hours after cafeteria fight
10% Boning up on Jesus **** for next parole-board hearing
20% Waiting for peaches-and-solvent mixture to ferment to drinkable levels
9% Working on law degree
19% Packing rectum with ground glass in hopes of preventing "it" from happening again
17% Waiting for exact right moment

Courtesy of the geniuses at The Onion and their 365-day calendar.