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I had the dumbest Date Ever he's from Iowa don't date anybody from Iowa

Discussion in 'BBS Hangout' started by juanming, Dec 23, 2021.

  1. juanming

    juanming Member

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    Hi. I need to vent really bad. I don't want to pay a therapist$100 an hour just to type this out so you guys are my therapy so here it goes.

    to like there's this guy in my complex that I've been had to crush on the last 2 years I dress look sound walk talk gay is pretty obvious. So like you can see me a hundred feet away you can tell I'm gay

    In this guy invites me over at 4 a. M. In the morning to his apartment he lives in my complex I've been talking to him for two years


    and I thought he was gay but then when I went to his apartment he told me he had an ex-wife.

    and I knew I was in trouble the first two seconds when I walked in because his coffee table is not a coffee table made out of wood it is Eagle race car tires stacked on top of each other with a piece of glass on top


    and he drives a truck and he had octane booster in his living room on top of his dresser by the front door so I knew I was completely screwed

    but that's not the point the point is I'm madly in love with this guy and I'm wondering why the f would he invite me over to his apartment at 4 a. M. On a Friday night in my complex and then I show up and he has like redneck hillbilly stuff all over the living room


    so I'm sitting there on the sofa almost about to cry because I'm like this guy is straight why would he invite me over. any actually started berating me and telling me I'm weird because I was so quiet and acting really quiet with my arms folded. And I didn't tell him this because I don't want to have a fist fight but I'm thinking to myself "well this sucks I came over here to get laid or to have a date with a gay man and instead of walking into a hillbilly redneck man the man with a deep voice and Eagle racing tires all over the living room and I'm like what the hell and he's also berating me because I'm acting weird"

    I didn't tell him that I told him I was just tired

    He hasn't called me said that was 2 weeks ago I'm really sad cuz everytime I look at my patio when do I see his truck

    So you're probably wondering why did I start this thread I'll tell you why


    so I'm sitting in his apartment and I'm wondering is he gay or straight and why would he invite a gayman and over at 4 in the morning

    And I got my answer I told him I'm from South Texas Houston and he told me he's from Midwest Iowa

    So I sat there thinking to myself ,"he doesn't have autism or Asperger's he is simply a dumb hick from Iowa"

    Let's be real guys yes I'm also a redneck from Texas I live in Nevada but still the point is there is no gay boys in Iowa it's only cornfields and Field of Dreams Kevin Costner.

    So as soon as he told me he's from Iowa I knew the date was over and doomed.

    because honestly he's so dumb all he knows about his trucks in cornfields he has never met at Glam boy like me he actually thought I was straight because I have like five kIDs. Okay I have one kid that I know of but I got at least two or three because I don't use protection. Lol

    That was a true story I'm not trying to be funny. here's my point my point is don't date anybody or go on a date with any male or female from Iowa because they are freaking slow and Gawd damn stupid

    I mean if you guys have seen me even a r****d can tell that I am gay. I mean I wear pink clothes for god sakes I make it obvious to everybody because I'm that horny. in this hillbilly from Iowa invites me over at 4 a. M. And does not make a move on me are you kidding me?

    yes I've been drinking and yes I'm crying because I'm in love with a guy because he's actually pretty cute he's very good-looking and has money and I am attracted to the money not Wang. he is so stupid because I'm very very attractive I've been offered gay p*rn even three months ago and I turned it down and he will not make will not moves on me

    So I'm actually wondering what is wrong with him

    and I'm sorry I had to vent and make a thread but I got my answer he is from Iowa that is my answer that is what's wrong with heem

    so that's my advice to you guys don't date anybody from Iowa I'm not sure what's going on from there but they don't know a ******* thing about life

    I had to vent and give you guys advice I'm very sad and this guy is so stupid
     
    #1 juanming, Dec 23, 2021
    Last edited: Dec 23, 2021
  2. blahblehblah

    blahblehblah Member

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    Sir, this is a Wendys...
     
  3. J.R.

    J.R. Member

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  4. jo mama

    jo mama Contributing Member

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    tell him youre having a party at your house and he is invited. but dont actually invite anyone else over...instead light up some candles, put some sade or coldplay on the stereo and throw on your sexiest kimono. when he shows up, answer the door in your kimono and two glasses of white wine. if he runs away then you know he isnt interested. if he comes in then you know you at least got a chance!

    this scenario actually happened to a friend of mine with a transgender person he worked with. she said she was having a bunch of people over after work and that he should come over. he went in and had a couple glasses of wine before he realized nobody else was coming. he left pretty quickly after that.

    also, can you really call this encounter a "date"? even if yall had done gay stuff together it still would have been more of a "hook-up" than a "date". am i wrong?
     
    #4 jo mama, Dec 23, 2021
    Last edited: Dec 23, 2021
  5. Newlin

    Newlin Member

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  6. KingCheetah

    KingCheetah Contributing Member

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  7. boomboom

    boomboom I GOT '99 PROBLEMS
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    Does he sideline as a country singer?
     
    B-Bob, Jontro, leroy and 7 others like this.
  8. McNultyisDrunk

    McNultyisDrunk Contributing Member

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    you might find a sympathetic ear on reddit....
     
    dmoneybangbang and vaioavan63 like this.
  9. robbie380

    robbie380 ლ(▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿ლ)
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    You should have asked him if he likes Lil Nas X


    problem solved.
     
  10. jo mama

    jo mama Contributing Member

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    and even though im not gay, i can at least acknowledge that there are some handsome dudes from iowa.

    ashton kutcher, john wayne, johnny carson and tom arnold to name a few.
     
    VanityHalfBlack and boomboom like this.
  11. vaioavan63

    vaioavan63 Contributing Member

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    Yep, pretty much any sub reddit will listen to OP. I recently deleted my 9 year old Reddit account. God, I felt the same relief I did when I deleted my Facebook. Such colossal, addictive, wastes of time that only poison the brain.
     
    B-Bob likes this.
  12. Rocket River

    Rocket River Member

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    LOL

    Rocket River
     
  13. Poloshirtbandit

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    I ain't reading all that but congratulations or sorry that happened.
     
    dmoneybangbang, Nook, B-Bob and 6 others like this.
  14. CrazyJoeDavola

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    What is "Leave Britney Alone!!!!"?
     
    Xerobull likes this.
  15. ThatBoyNick

    ThatBoyNick Member

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    **** y'all that was a good read

    I think he wanted to bone you brother, don't lose hope. You can be the yee to his haw
     
  16. DonkeyMagic

    DonkeyMagic Contributing Member
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    That wang don’t suck itself. Get to work !
     
  17. Buck Turgidson

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    "Guy invites me over at 4AM on a Tuesday" should be a huge red flag.

    You tell him you want Brunch next Sunday, all day. FFB will pay.
     
  18. Roscoe Arbuckle

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    I'm Fatty & I approve this message.
     
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  19. Roscoe Arbuckle

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    [​IMG]
     
    RasaqBoi likes this.
  20. Buck Turgidson

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    Jackie Daytona, Regular Human Bartender

    [​IMG]
     
    Rashmon, B-Bob, jiggyfly and 5 others like this.

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