[2016-17] Chandler Parsons as a Memphis Grizzly

Im tellin you guys, with the new cap we can all get at least 2 mil contracts if we try..

 

Wait. This can't be right. Parsons was supposed to sign with the Rockets and I was going to be surprised.

 

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet" data-lang="en"><p lang="en" dir="ltr">If Chandler Parsons is getting $94 million over four years we're all underpaid.</p>&mdash; Frank Isola (@FisolaNYDN) <a href="https://twitter.com/FisolaNYDN/status/748982419701788674">July 1, 2016</a></blockquote>
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What a southwest slut.

 

:grin::grin::grin:

 

<blockquote class="instagram-media" data-instgrm-captioned data-instgrm-version="7" style=" background:#FFF; border:0; border-radius:3px; box-shadow:0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width:658px; padding:0; width:99.375%; width:-webkit-calc(100% - 2px); width:calc(100% - 2px);"><div style="padding:8px;"> <div style=" background:#F8F8F8; line-height:0; margin-top:40px; padding:50.0% 0; text-align:center; width:100%;"> <div style=" background:url(data:image/png;base64,iVBORw0KGgoAAAANSUhEUgAAACwAAAAsCAMAAAApWqozAAAABGdBTUEAALGPC/xhBQAAAAFzUkdCAK7OHOkAAAAMUExURczMzPf399fX1+bm5mzY9AMAAADiSURBVDjLvZXbEsMgCES5/P8/t9FuRVCRmU73JWlzosgSIIZURCjo/ad+EQJJB4Hv8BFt+IDpQoCx1wjOSBFhh2XssxEIYn3ulI/6MNReE07UIWJEv8UEOWDS88LY97kqyTliJKKtuYBbruAyVh5wOHiXmpi5we58Ek028czwyuQdLKPG1Bkb4NnM+VeAnfHqn1k4+GPT6uGQcvu2h2OVuIf/gWUFyy8OWEpdyZSa3aVCqpVoVvzZZ2VTnn2wU8qzVjDDetO90GSy9mVLqtgYSy231MxrY6I2gGqjrTY0L8fxCxfCBbhWrsYYAAAAAElFTkSuQmCC); display:block; height:44px; margin:0 auto -44px; position:relative; top:-22px; width:44px;"></div></div> <p style=" margin:8px 0 0 0; padding:0 4px;"> <a href="https://www.instagram.com/p/BHVS_JsB_Z1/" style=" color:#000; font-family:Arial,sans-serif; font-size:14px; font-style:normal; font-weight:normal; line-height:17px; text-decoration:none; word-wrap:break-word;" target="_blank">Really excited for this opportunity and new chapter with the @memgrizz !! This is a perfect fit for me and I can't wait to get started!! I want to thank the owner RP for believing in me, Coach Fiz, JB, and everyone else involved!!</a></p> <p style=" color:#c9c8cd; font-family:Arial,sans-serif; font-size:14px; line-height:17px; margin-bottom:0; margin-top:8px; overflow:hidden; padding:8px 0 7px; text-align:center; text-overflow:ellipsis; white-space:nowrap;">A photo posted by ChandlerParsons (@chandlerparsons) on <time style=" font-family:Arial,sans-serif; font-size:14px; line-height:17px;" datetime="2016-07-01T20:45:58+00:00">Jul 1, 2016 at 1:45pm PDT</time></p></div></blockquote> <script async defer src="//platform.instagram.com/en_US/embeds.js"></script>

 

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet" data-lang="en"><p lang="en" dir="ltr">I want to thank <a href="https://twitter.com/mcuban">@mcuban</a> , the entire staff, teammates and fans for everything the past 2 seasons. I love you and wish you the best of luck!</p>&mdash; Chandler Parsons (@ChandlerParsons) <a href="https://twitter.com/ChandlerParsons/status/748983444374302721">July 1, 2016</a></blockquote>
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how exactly do contract negotiations with chandler parsons go? does the owner just get lost in his eyes and acquiesce to his every demand? i don't get it. i mean i'm looking at a chandler parson's picture right now and i'm not feeling anything. well i mean, maybe a little. but come on, i'm not going to just offer him a bunch of money. i mean yeah, the feeling is getting stronger and i'm starting to feel a little dizzy and faint, but to just give him all the money...that......would be.........craaaazzzyyyy ---







oh chandler, i never noticed how soulful your eyes were. the way the light just dances in them i could just look and look and - what that's?

you need more money? well i should say so. why shouldn't you get it? i could probably transfer some money from my bank account and - what that's?

all of it? ok, just let me get this wire together here over the weekend.

today? well certainly.

chandsome needs that money? i agree, whatever you say. so lets talk about why you're actually worth this money, i was thinking - what's that?

you have to leave now? yeah you're probably pretty busy.

ok well thanks for this meeting. could you get the door on the way out? ***slam*** ---








oh man, that was weird, i think i blacked out there for a second. anyway, what was i saying? oh yeah, i just don't understand how chandler parsons keeps getting these contracts. he has average stats and produces average teams and has an injury history. i guess it's just a mystery.

 

So now he's gonna be a Titans fan?

 

:insert picture of chandler seducing fredette:

 

Chandsome should've chosen Portland but his ego couldn't handle playing next to Lillard every day and being reminded of that shot.

 

I predict Chan the Man will be the first NBA player in history to miss a game because of bad botox. Book it!

 

You can already pose with your new jersey like that? I thought it's still moratorium period..

 

JB with the two piece to the Rockets jaw. Parsons and Conley.

 

Memphis just screwed itself for the next 4 years because Chandler will not add to one additional win. Albatross contract. Morey's chuckling right and saying damn, that boy did it again!

 

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet" data-lang="en"><p lang="und" dir="ltr"><a href="https://twitter.com/ChandlerParsons">@ChandlerParsons</a> <a href="https://t.co/KvOk0ueZkY">pic.twitter.com/KvOk0ueZkY</a></p>&mdash; Eily Dunleavy (@dallas_mavs33) <a href="https://twitter.com/dallas_mavs33/status/748983623500517376">July 1, 2016</a></blockquote>
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welp

 

Sounds like you're in for a real surprise

 

[rQUOTEr]Text message from Chandler Parsons on why he chose the Grizzlies: "I really believed in Coach Fiz. Nobody in the league has coached better wings than him. I trust [assistant coach J.B. Bickerstaff] with my life. They have nobody like me, and their veteran, experienced players are a perfect fit with me.

"Toughest decision of my life though. Portland is incredible."[/rQUOTEr]

 

LOL

Parsons:" I trust JB with my life"

 

At this rate every team will be capped out .Lol